F Train to Brooklyn

Today I was thinking on my way to Brooklyn how strange it is that I rarely see any Caucasian panhandlers on the train. More times than not, they just aren't there. There is of course the flute dude who plays everyday in the Downtown Broadway/Lafayette station, but he is the only one that I can place notably in my lexicon for folk I am currently writing about.

But today on the way home from Brooklyn I ate my worlds. I ran into an honest man, or seemingly so, seeking out money on the train. Considering I take this train back and forth between Brooklyn and I have never seen him makes me wonder if he was legit.

His speech was heartfelt and earnest and very well rehearsed (too rehearsed perhaps?). He was homeless, just out of jail, and kicked out of his family. He had stayed at a homeless shelter for the past two nights, but was recently attacked in a homeless shelter. He was seeking out a total of 15 dollars so that he could stay at the YMCA for a night.

Curious, I asked him how much he currently had. His reply, while emptying out his pockets, "About six bucks." So I handed him a dollar and I said he better get off the train at 25 bucks, otherwise I would be severely disappointed.

His response. "Ma'am, I don't want to be on this train anymore than you do. Its just a necessity. I start work Monday, so I will certainly be off this train by then. Embarrassment doesn't even begin to cover how I feel right now." I bid him farewell, and wished him luck. If I see him again in a few weeks, I will worry.

But then again, here I am calling him honest and believing his story. And he was the first panhandler I gave money to....I think this plays into so much of the racism that I had ingrained into my brain at a young age in Southern California. It was "common knowledge" that beggars weren't white. Right, common knowledge. That is until you see them and you realize that you grew up being lied to. But sometimes its hard to bury those lies....


I hope he finds what he is looking for....